Hey, if anybody needs any last minute gift ideas....

I'd like my boss, Frank Shirley... OOPS! Sorry, got carried away there.

However, after Christmas I will be buying myself the gift of a bagel slicer. One that won't take a huge chunk of my thumb out with it!!! YOWWWW! I know, I can buy the frozen pre-sliced, and they're good. But the bakery had such lovely fresh bagels (unsliced) that I chose them instead. And they are delish, to be certain. But slicing them is another story.

Another great gift idea I wish to pursue is 3 or 4 days of total vegetation.... where I can wake and sleep as I wish, with no deeds to do or promises to keep. Just a chance to make up for all the rest and the sleep and the relaxation that is so hard to find in everyday life.....

That's it; that's the list! (thanks, MJA, for a great phrase!)

I declare a POX on bad Christmas music.

Yeah, long time no blog. Lots of stuff has gone on but nothing that demanded that I write about it. But with the Christmas season upon us, you *knew* I'd have to share some thoughts on this -- bad Christmas music!!! I declare a POX on bad Christmas music.

Here's a most egregious example: Several years ago, someone I once knew had a CD given to him by a family member, probably as a joke. Last year, I found this CD at Big Lots. Let's just say the music therein makes Jessica Simpson's bad-sounding "Sanny CLAAAAAWZ!" (from the recent NBC special) sound like Leontyne Price by comparison. It's not one of those "so bad it's good" -- it's one of those "Oh my LORD, did someone actually PAY money to have this thing produced and marketed??" That alone made me have to buy it.

It's called "Southern Christmas Classics" -- but there's only one song on there I even remotely recognized (more on that "gem" in a minute). There's the opening song called "Star of Bethlehem" -- no, not "O Beautiful Star of Bethlehem" (which the Judds did a few years back). Let me just share one couplet of the lyrics (at least as I think it went; hard to get a precise transcription over my howls of shock and semi-laughter):

He didn't send his message through a fax or IBM
But he sent his love to us, through the Star of Bethlehem.

Then there is the all-time "classic"..... called (and I am quoting verbatim here): "Ain't That What Christmas Is About?" Here's the refrain:

Ain't that what Christmas is about?
So let all your good feelings out
It's the time of year to say "I love you"
Oh, ain't that what Christmas is about?

All I could say was "Oh my..... Oh my....."

And the one song I recognized? Since when is "On the Good Ship Lollipop" a Christmas song???? HUH?????

****

And the winner of the worst Christmas single ever, bar none?

The worst Christmas song -- the one I turn off while howling in disgust and writhing in pain -- is that damn "Christmas Shoes" (where the kids buy their dying mother a pair of gold shoes so she'll look pretty for Jesus).

Now, before you go calling me a totally heartless bitch, let me say that the song is designed to tug every heartstring (and it does). You'd have to be a completely heartless soul not to mist up the first time you hear it -- just on sappy sentiment alone.

But the stations around here are playing it at least 2-3 times a day, and it just makes me ill to hear it. PS: Haven't heard it yet? Really? Can I come live in your hometown? Apparently, judging by the number of times it's played around here, folks just can't get enough of it.

Furthermore, there is some appalling theology contained therein -- namely this: Is heaven so drained for new and exciting stuff that Jesus has decided to get His jollies by standing at the pearly gates, looking at people coming in and saying, "HEEEEY! Cute shoes!"????

I have stated before that if the master copy from the studio, every piece of purchased sheet music, every CD with this song, and every ripped MP3 file of this song were to suddenly, spontaneously combust, leaving it forever destroyed, I wouldn't shed a tear. I stand by this. Call me heartless. I can take it.

Just WTP is going on?

I swear, I wrote a post about a month ago, but it never got published. Oh well.....

Just a few random thoughts for the day:
1. Dang, it's hot this summer...... whatever happened to a nice mild spring and summer creeeeeeeeping its way in? It was like one morning, it was crisp and 50 degrees, with a nice high around 72. And a week later, it was 70 degrees at 7:00 AM, stretching on up to about 90!

2. Thank God for Sonic and their slushes..... MMMMM! They are making this godawful heat a little more bearable!

Life and Other Plans

Yeah, yeah, yeah.... it has been a long time since I put in an entry. Sorry.... life came along and had other plans.

So what's on my mind right now? Lots of stuff churning about. I suppose the thing on my mind most is the political stuff. Because I was working on my degree in political science, I should be completely intrigued with all the twists and turns in this year's Presidential race. I should find all the accusations and allegations completely holding my interest, and sitting on the edge of my seat awaiting the outcome.

As you may have guessed, I am not. While I am not apathetic about politics and the process, this year, I find myself underwhelmed by what is being offered. In 2000, I voted for the Libertarian candidate simply because I could not bring myself to vote for either Gore or Bush. The Libertarians may get my vote again in 2004, simply as a protest. Ralph Nader may get my vote, again as a protest. And yet strangely enough, the two-party system sure beats a handful of equally powerful parties having to work in a coalition government. YUCK!

And now to another hot topic: La Toya getting the boot last night on "American Idol".... I was shocked as all get-out. Due to other things going on in my life, I've only been able to see the last 3 or 4 weeks of the competition. Her voice has been amazing. As a journeyman singer (who is now "too old" for AI), I have been incredibly impressed with her voice, her style, her stage presence. So I have no doubts at all that we have not heard or seen the last of Ms. La Toya London.

posted by nettiemac at 3:57:01 PM