Saturday, February 18, 2006

Silver Thoughts about Golden Throats 2

Having sufficiently given this CD a whirl or several last night, all I can say is this -- it's as gloriously wretched as the 1st one, and maybe even worse. I posted a few comments last night (see below) and now have a better take on the songs themselves:

1. John Shaft -- Sammy Davis Jr.
The most soulless "Shaft" I have ever heard. Now, I love Sammy -- I am definitely a Rat-Pack kind of girl. This makes me long for "The Candy Man"....... I'm serious as a heart attack.

2. Sunshine Superman -- Mel Torme
I was disappointed. I was truly expecting a scatted-up version from the "Velvet Fog" and just got a pedestrian rendition instead.

3. Light My Fire -- Mae West
Now this is wretched stuff at its (er) finest. But then again, so was her "Twist & Shout" from Volume I. She has a great back-up group on this one -- far better than the non-singers on "T&S." And it's certainly more within her limited vocal range. Still, it's NEVER gonna make me forget Jim Morrison.

4. Hey Jude -- Bing Crosby
Serviceable rendition. Great for Open Mic Night at the local Elks Club, but nothing I'd have put to vinyl. And I love Bing's stuff too, but not this!

5. All I Really Want To Do -- Sebastian Cabot
From the (er) classic Sebastian Cabot, actor. Bob Dylan, poet. Dramatic readings with musical backdrop. He singlehandedly butchered Dylan, and that's just wrong on 10,000 levels. Give me the Byrds anyday!

6. Put A Little Love In Your Heart -- Leonard Nimoy
If this was the only version of this song, it would seriously make me consider hatred as an occupation. Thank God for Al Green & Annie Lennox (my favorite version of this song, from the movie Scrooged).

7. It Was A Very Good Year -- William Shatner
It was a very bad idea.

8. Dixie Chicken -- Jack Jones
It sure beats the hell out of Garth Brooks' remake (and that's just because I got over Garth Brooks long before he got over himself). Again, this isn't gonna make me forget Little Feat anytime in the next millennium. Strangely enough, I did play this one several times... but it's because I love the song and was singing it as Little Feat did.

9. In The Ghetto -- Sammy Davis, Jr.
A 7.2 on the Richter scale, all due to Elvis' turning in his grave at this butchering of an already bad song. This makes me long for "Keep Your Eye on the Sparrow" (the theme from Baretta, done by Sammy).

10. Nights on Broadway -- Chad Everett
A perfectly good Bee Gees song, completely devoid of soul, emotion, and life in the hands of Dr. Joe Gannon. Wait a minute.... wasn't Joe Gannon the partner of Joe Friday on Dragnet? When did he become a doctor, after leaving the force? Oh wait... that was Bill Gannon. Ah well. At any rate, this is bad. Not totally wretched, but pretty dang bad.

11. Stand By Me -- Cassius Clay
Okay, this one shocked me. It wasn't that bad. It wasn't great, and it certainly wasn't gonna make me think "He missed his calling, going into boxing instead of singing" -- but it wasn't bad. Until..... the final chorus: totally off-beat, and occasionally off-key. Like he'd already been punched a little too hard. But overall, 7 stars outta 10.

12. Bridge Over Troubled Water -- Senator Sam J. Ervin, Jr.
Sam Ervin, senator. Paul Simon, poet.

13. (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction -- Phyllis Diller
Horrendous. Awful. Missung lyrics. Poor voice control. Makes William Hung sound like Mick Jagger. And worst? A comedy routine stuck in the middle. This had to be intended as a joke, right?

14. Give Peace a Chance -- Mitch Miller & The Gang
Okay, I thought Phyllis Diller and Mae West were the worst things on this CD. Not even close. After hearing this, John Lennon shoulda taken his happy warm gun and used it to shoot up the master copy of this song. And to shoot the snark right outta Mitch Miller (not him personally, just all his snark). Mitch "Oh, I'm So Much Better Than All This Music So I'll Make It Fit *My* Sense Of Style" Miller. POX!

I shall review Volumes 3 and 4 once I get them (and at decent prices).

1 comment:

Talmadge G. said...

I got some bronze reactions ... or would you prefer the nickel plating?

1. John Shaft -- Sammy Davis Jr.
He should take three words from this song to heart: SHUT YOUR MOUTH! I knew kissing Archie Bunker would lead to worse things........

3. Light My Fire -- Mae West
She performed this at the Fontainebleu on Miami Beach ... and promptly got arrested by the Miami Dade vice squad!

4. Hey Jude -- Bing Crosby
Bommm, bommm, BOM-BOM-BOM! BOMMM!!!
Hardly the worst Beatle cover; I dare say that honor goes to Tiffany: "I Saw HIM Standing There"

BRB - gotta run across the hall and ralph.

Okay, back.

6. Put A Little Love In Your Heart -- Leonard Nimoy
In the words of another of his, umm, classics: That's completely ILLOGICAL.

7. 7. It Was A Very Good Year -- William Shatner
It was a very bad idea.

Gotta wonder why Shatner's able to walk. I'd have figured Sinatra would've sent some of his, uh, buddies over to put the fear of God into Kirk's kneecaps.

9. In The Ghetto -- Sammy Davis, Jr.
A 7.2 on the Richter scale, all due to Elvis' turning in his grave at this butchering of an already bad song.


Even more proof that Elvis is DEAD. As if Lisa Marie's folly wasn't bad enough (Jacko became his SIL, and the seismographs barely budged) ...

10. Nights on Broadway -- Chad Everett
I'd have paid good money to hear Jack Webb sing that.

11. Stand By Me -- Cassius Clay
Howard Cosell did.

12. Bridge Over Troubled Water -- Senator Sam J. Ervin, Jr.
Sam Ervin, senator. Paul Simon, poet.


Now THAT'S funny. (and, very scary)

BRB - gotta go mend my busted gut.

Okay, back.

13. (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction -- Phyllis Diller
And, in return, The Glimmer Twins wrote "Sympathy For the Devil" and dedicated it to her.

14. Give Peace a Chance -- Mitch Miller & The Gang
Forget black hoodlums; MITCH is who gave the term "gang" a bad connotation.

I hear somebody downstairs put nothing but Pink Floyd, Soundgarden and Velvet Underground in Mitch's iPod.

-TG