It finally happened. I had my Talking Heads moment where, for a brief split second, I actually thought to myself, "Well...... how did I get here?"
I had gone to get lunch. I was driving back to the office, and turned onto the street for our building. It hit me: "What am I doing here?" Not in the physical sense -- I haven't lost THAT much touch with reality. But it all was that split-second, but whole lifetime (think Picard in The Inner Light episode) stop-and-think moment. It wasn't a sad thing -- nothing that made me stop and weep and lament my place in life. I've done pretty decent, all things considered. Not perfect by any stretch, and certainly not the "When I grow up...." life I created for myself as a child. But pretty good nonetheless.
Just one of those "whoa...." moments. The ones that make you wonder if there's something else in your life that needs a good changing. I can't imagine what else ..... I've got enough changes on my plate in the last few years. As soon as I say this, and post it for the world to see, disaster may strike.
And I'm actually mostly content to let things roll, to let the Fates unfold the cloth for me and follow suit. Yeah, I've made a few detours and changes along the way which have altered the tapestry. Surprisingly enough, this doesn't bother the control freak in me.
Wow. Enough deep philosophizing for one lunch time.